When we feel anxious, shut down, or overwhelmed, it can be hard to understand why. Often, these responses aren’t just “in our head”—they’re deeply rooted in the body’s nervous system. Polyvagal Theory, developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, offers a compassionate and science-based way of understanding how our nervous system shapes our experience of safety, danger, and connection.
As a clinical psychologist, I often draw on Polyvagal Theory to help clients make sense of their emotional and physiological responses—especially those shaped by trauma, chronic stress, or early relational wounds.
What Is Polyvagal Theory?
At its heart, Polyvagal Theory is about how the autonomic nervous system (ANS) responds to signals of safety or threat. It explains why we sometimes feel calm and open, and other times anxious, frozen, or disconnected—even without any obvious external danger.
Dr. Porges’ key insight was that the vagus nerve - a key part of the ANS—has three different pathways, each linked to a different “state” of being:
Social Engagement (Ventral Vagal)
This is our safe and connected state. We feel calm, curious, and open to others. Our heart rate is regulated, our facial muscles are expressive, and we can think clearly and engage in meaningful relationships.
Mobilisation (Sympathetic Activation)
This is the “fight or flight” state. We feel anxious, restless, or irritable. The body prepares to respond to perceived danger. This is a normal part of our survival system but can become distressing when chronically activated.
Shutdown (Dorsal Vagal)
This is the freeze or collapse response. We may feel numb, hopeless, spaced out, or disconnected. This state can be protective during overwhelming situations, especially in trauma, but may persist when not processed.
Why This Matters in Therapy
Polyvagal Theory gives us a language for what’s happening inside. When clients say, “I know I’m safe but I don’t feel safe,” or “I just shut down and can’t think straight,” this theory helps us understand those experiences without blame or shame.
Here’s how it can support the healing process:
Increased self-awareness: Learning to recognise which state you’re in helps you respond with more compassion and care toward yourself.
Practical regulation tools: We can use tailored strategies - like grounding, breath work, or co-regulation with others—to help shift your nervous system toward safety.
Trauma-informed treatment: Polyvagal Theory aligns beautifully with therapies like EMDR, parts work (IFS), and somatic approaches, helping us safely access and process deeper wounds.
How We Work With the Nervous System
In my work, I integrate Polyvagal Theory into therapy in gentle and empowering ways:
Helping clients map their own nervous system states and notice patterns.
Exploring personal cues of safety and danger, often shaped by early experiences.
Using body-based tools to support emotional regulation and grounding.
Encouraging connection with others—noticing when it feels safe, and why it sometimes doesn’t.
Final Thoughts
Your nervous system isn’t broken - it’s trying to protect you, even when it feels like it’s working against you. Understanding Polyvagal Theory can be a powerful step in learning to listen to your body, create new pathways for safety and connection, and move toward deeper healing.
If you’re curious about how this approach might support you, feel free to reach out or book a free consultation call.